Recent Movie Reviews


The Fisherman The Fisherman

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

...I'm not sure what I just watched, but it was neat. The camera movements were a nice touch, but they could stand to be smoothed out and slowed down a bit - it felt a little bit jerky and spastic.

I liked it, even if I don't get it.


HMarioProductionsH responds:

Thanks for the review I will put it into practice


Calgary's Episode 3 Calgary's Episode 3

Rated 3 / 5 stars

The actual animation does not appear to be your biggest obstacle. I could pick things apart, but in essence I believe the audio is causing you the most trouble here. It sounds like you've got a combination of bad compression settings in flash and a microphone that doesn't do the recordings justice.

Otherwise, not a bad entry, from a technical standpoint.


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The-Rat responds:

this was quite helpful, actually. I'm not just clicking the helpful button at random.


Dare You To Move Dare You To Move

Rated 0 / 5 stars

A fat, naked man running across the screen on all fours for the entire duration of a song that you probably don't even have the rights to use?

I classify that as spam, and there's really nothing else to be said.

0/10
0/5


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ziraffe responds:

ni99a wanna fight me fight these tears

Recent Game Reviews


JRPG Defense JRPG Defense

Rated 4 / 5 stars

The "azure" logo immediately made me think of viagra - to the point that I actually looked it up on google to compare. That was weird.

Only criticism: upon starting a new game, the introduction goes by pretty quick. I'm a fast reader, so it wasn't a problem, but other people might not be able to get through it fast enough. I suggest making that slower, or let the user click to continue or something.

Other than that, it looks pretty decent, and it's not a bad game at all. Nice work.


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Days of Monsters Days of Monsters

Rated 5 / 5 stars

One Reason.

I had to write a review for one simple reason.

I spent over 10 minutes just playing with the buttons in the main menu.

Making the button rollovers cue a vibraphone note that's in tune with the music... You, sir, are a genius. I haven't even played the rest of the game yet and I'm already satisfied.



Windows Doors Windows Doors

Rated 5 / 5 stars

XD Fantastic!

I especially loved the pedophile chat idea - is the code for that original, or was it based on something someone else did? Because it's really flippin good.

I thought my convo with the compy was pretty amusing. Here's a bit of it:

---
You: My name is MEGATRON
Archon68: That's a very nice name, MEGATRON.
You: I come from the stars
Archon68: I've never met anyone from the stars before.
You: I seek the cube
Archon68: We seek the same thing.
You: ARE YOU AN AUTOBOT!?
Archon68: Yes I am an AUTOBOT. How did you know?
You: I MUST DESTROY YOU WITH THE CUBE!!!
Archon68: Why must you DESTROY me WITH THE CUBE?
You: Because you are working with my mortal enemies!
Archon68: That makes sense to me. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am working with your mortal enemies.
You: YES PLEASE DO
...
You: WHAT IS YOUR REAL NAME?
Archon68: Archon68 is my real name.
You: That's a silly name. No cybertronian mother would call her child that
Archon68: A silly name is a terrible thing to waste. So? Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
You: I think you were assigned to spy on me by the autobots.
Archon68: Me? I was?
You: YES!!!
Archon68: It goes without saying.
You: Then know that I will have my revenge.
Archon68: Interesting deduction. Is that a fact. I am very happy for you.
You: Is that sarcasm I sense?
Archon68: Do you often put others before yourself?
You: Hell no... Wait, you're being sarcastic again! How dare you!
Archon68: 7. Once more? I'm waiting. Yes, I was being sarcastic. Should I use a :-). I am not sure if I can quantify the answer.
Are you testing me?
You: Ahahahaha!!! You have an easily overloaded computational system, "Archon68".
Archon68: In the context of tight is your vagina , I don't understand " Ahahahaha." . Maybe more than one easily overloaded computational system Archon68.
You: I did it again! Mwahahaha!
Archon68: Once more? Where? momma... Do you often seek pleasure?
You: The pleasure of the cube.
Archon68: Thank you for your politeness.
You: You're welcome.
Archon68: Don't mention it.
You: I won't.
---

That system is fantastic. If you made that engine, Archon, I have to say - you're good. Although, I'm still wondering about the Loebner Prize... guess I'll have to look it up.

Overall, it was a highly amusing submission, and was thoroughly enjoyed by yours truely. I have no suggestions. 10/10.

Power to you, Archon!


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Archawn responds:

That's hilarious! The chatbot is based on some other code, but I programmed a bunch of custom responses and ideas. It's like code-collaboration.

Recent Audio Reviews


theme for robots in space theme for robots in space

Rated 5 / 5 stars

That felt nice.

I absolutely loved the atmosphere in this. And actually, contrary to what BlueOceans said, I really liked the sound of the lead synth - and the levels of the bass synth are only MAYBE a little too high until you crescendo the lead. Personally I think the way the lead comes out from just under the bass gives that transition a nice contrast, and that the sound of the bass synth is still round enough that it manages to feel subtle despite being a little louder than the melody at the start. But hey, opinions opinions, they're like tomatoes around here.

In a weird way it reminded me a bit of Donkey Kong Country, but I have no idea why because as far as I can remember this doesn't really sound anything like those games. STRANGE.

Really enjoyed your panning work, worth putting headphones on for.

That was a lot of talk just to say I liked it, but hey. I did.

If there's one thing I might suggest, it's to look at the drums. The sounds you used for those were the only thing that seemed to stick out to me - they worked, but they felt a little out of place, a little too bright and pointy, if that makes sense to you. That, and the individual drum sounds were very static - for example the kick sound was exactly the same sound every time it was triggered, as far as I heard. It would be nice if those sounds were a little more varied, because drums get triggered so often that the sounds get redundant. That said, I understand that this is picky and that this is something that gets skipped very easily on a deadline - I have often skipped this myself, only to regret it later.

But who knows, I might be the only one bothered by that. ANYWAYS, nice work, and merry christmas!


People find this review helpful!
johnfn responds:

Thanks! I see the comparison to DKC, I think they both have a nostalgic sort of vibe to them. I actually haven't listened to DKC all too much, getting on that right now. I like it a lot. Maybe it's also the vibrato lead :D

I WAS pretty lazy on the drums. I had trouble because it's a pretty laid back song, so I thought I couldn't do anything too special or complex. You're right though, I could have done better there.

Thank you for the extensive review and merry christmas to you too!


Shiny Metal Blues (WIP) Shiny Metal Blues (WIP)

Rated 3 / 5 stars

This is an interesting entry. I really don't know where to place it...

Anyway, here's some constructive criticism for you!

Right off the top, I'll tell you that you're putting a little too much distortion on that guitar, imo. If you're doing it that way because you're going for a more metal kind of sound, you'll be better off changing the distortion itself than increasing the damage output on it.

Your piece sounds really dry - some reverb and delay would be good things to add, to give the song some "space" in the sound.

You could stand to bring the piano down a notch.

Play with some EQ (equalization) - right now things sound a little muddy. Part of that can be solved by using some effective equalization techniques. There are some great tutorials on EQ methods out there, I recommend spending some time looking at those and experimenting.

There seems to be a blip at the end of your guitar riff, which makes it sound a little non-contiguous. Not sure if that's a recording thing, or a release setting, or what. Not a big thing, but you'll definitely want to look into little things like that if you want to present a polished product.

Lastly, don't be discouraged if it sounds like I'm nailing you with a bunch of things I don't like - I'm telling you these things because I want to help you, and you sound like you want to get better. We've all been there, and I know how that can feel.

Keep pushing, OfficeGalactic.



-:: Little Ben ::- -:: Little Ben ::-

Rated 5 / 5 stars

A nice, lighthearted theme. I enjoyed listening.

Because I like to include at least a little constructive criticism in my reviews, I might suggest looking at the brass parts that start around 0:36. They're not quite sitting in the chord structure and it's creating some mild dissonance. That being said, I like dissonance - I'm just wondering whether it was intentional dissonance or not. Either way, still a good entry, for sure.

Good luck, bud!


Agitat0r responds:

Thanks for the advices a lot. Yeah the brass is out of place. And I really tried you make some dissonance.